


the ghost of you

by orphan_account



Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Farm/Ranch, Alternate Universe - Military, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blind Character, Brainwashing, Children of Characters, Depressing, Emotional Manipulation, F/F, Heavy Angst, Kidnapping, Lesbian Disaster Violet (Walking Dead: Done Running), Lesbian Violet (Walking Dead: Done Running), Married Couple, Memory Loss, Military, Missing Persons, Older Clementine (Walking Dead), Physical Abuse, Post-War, Sad, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:00:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23470567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Violet's off to war, after a short life with her wife, Clementine, and their two twin daughters on their little farm. Clementine would beg and scream her wife not to go, not to leave her and their daughters, but war was war and somebody had to fight.
Relationships: Clementine/Violet (Walking Dead: Done Running)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 79





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> apologies for my absence 
> 
> my mental health is in decline so I'm taking some time away from some stories (a little more) so I hope this suffices in the meantime. There will be more parts but it won't be very long. Thanks for reading

"Turn around!" The brunette giggled, putting her hands on her wife's shoulders, she forced her to face the mirror as she fixed her hair and cap from behind. Violet giggled and Clementine had to stop for a moment to wrap her arms around her chest.

"Clem! You're creasing my clothes," Violet said as her wife lightly swayed her back and forth before kissing her cheek. Violet groaned and wiped it off. "Can't turn up to a war with lipstick on my face, huh?"

"As long as you don't come back from war with any on your clothes, you and me will be just fine." She chuckled, patting her back before turning her wife to look at her. She flattened out her clothes again as she looked up at her smiling face. "Are you excited, Vi?"

Violet nodded. "It's scary, yeah, I know it's dangerous, but... damn, I'm so ready for this. I feel like I've been waiting my whole life for this."

Clementine nodded, buttoning up Violet's shirt. She was quiet and pursed her lips together, the blonde sending something was wrong. She put both hands on her wife's forearms.

"Babe... I know it's hard-"

"You don't, though." She shook her head. "Not in the slightest. I mean, I've been waiting this whole war out hoping, praying to fucking, I don't know, anyone that you wouldn't get taken. Now you're leaving me, and it's not like you're going on a business trip like normal couples - you're leaving me to go to war. War, where you could die! I just, I can't... I can't see how you would still want to go with everything we have and I, I know this is your dream and your passion but it just doesn't feel right to me." She stated, gripping onto her wife's jacket with her thumbs and index fingers. She looked down and sniffled before looking up at the blonde and patting her chest. "Make sure you say goodbye to the girls, okay?" She smiled with teary eyes.

Violet frowned, cupping her cheeks, she brought her in for a kiss fueled by tears in the brunette's eyes before she pulled away. 

"Save it for when you come back, okay?" She smiled, stroking the blonde's cheek. Violet nodded, turning away from the mirror and out of the bedroom, her wife followed silently as Violet walked towards the room opposite theirs.

She gripped the handle tightly and turned it, walking in slowly to the darkened room. The only thing lighting her way, a nightlight that shone up at the ceiling and the light from her own bedroom down the hall.

Violet very quickly crouched down beside her daughter's bed, stroking her curly blocked locks, she smiled with eyes full of tears as she leaned over to kiss her temple.

"Goodnight, Evie. I'll see you when I come home." She said, stroking her hair for a few seconds more before she stood up and walked across the room to her other daughter's bed and crouched beside that, too.

Violet admired how different her daughters looked despite being identical. Maybe it was just because she was their mother - but they always seemed to have these small differences that Violet didn't even have to think about to notice. Her eyes became teary now as she kissed her second daughter goodnight.

"Goodnight, Hope."

"Mommy?" Violet's eyes widened as she stroked her cheek, shushing her. The young girl looked confused. 

"Go to sleep, you don't want to wake your sister. I'll see you later, okay, baby?"

"Where are you going?"

"Going to fight the bad guys, baby, don't worry. Okay? Will you keep your sister and your mommy safe while I'm away?"

Hope nodded, her eyebrows still furrowed. "Please don't go too long, mommy."

"I would never." Violet leaned over, kissing her forehead again, she went to stand up.

"Go to sleep, Hopey." Clementine whispered from the doorway, "Me, you and Evie can go get something nice tomorrow, but you need to sleep."

"Yes mommy."

"Goodnight, love." She and Violet left the room, the blonde holding the doorknob tightly again as she closed it over. She sighed and a smile came in her lips as she looked down at the floor.

"Evie could sleep through anything, did you ever notice that? She's just like you. I bet she'd sleep through a war, huh? Haha," Violet turned around to see her wife smothering her teary face in her sleeve and panicked. "Clem-"

"How can you stand there and joke about our daughter sleeping through a war when you're about to go fight in one? How can you lie to Hope and tell her you'll be back when you know damn well, you might not be? How can you do that to them? They're only five years old, Vi!"

"I know, I know..."

"If you know, then why are you going? Why are you risking never seeing Evie or Hope again? They're our miracles! We got so lucky to have them and you spend five fucking years with them and walk away, walk right into your coffin??" She practically screamed now which masked the sound of the bedroom door closing. Clementine had heard it though, and as her wife stepped out of the way, her heart dropped.  
"Evie, sweetie,"

"What is it, baby?" Violet asked as she turned around. The small girl fiddled with her hands, just like Violet used to do.

"Um, I, I heard shouting and I had an accident..." She said shakily. Clementine turned to walk away.

She sighed. "It's okay, Ev. It happens. Come on, I'll change you."

"Let me," Violet said, reaching down to pick her up, "Please? It could be a while before I get to again."

"Fine. I'll get the sheets." She stated as she walked down the stairs and towards the linen closet.

Violet carried Evie to her room, where she then stood her on the floor and went to get one of her big shirts from her dresser. "Now, normally I'd get you into some new pyjama's, but given that we live in a very hot place," She commented as she cleaned up the girl and slipped her into some clean clothes, "But given that Hope's asleep, this will have to do." She grinned at the girl who looked very confused.

"Mommy, why are you wearing that?"

"Hm?"

"You dressed like um, sol-soldurs from movies."

Violet smiled sadly. "I'm going off, honey. I'm going to fight all the bad people to keep your mommy and Hopey and you safe. I need you to be really strong for me though, okay? You're gonna need to help your mommy out around the farm. So that means you need to help her bring in the clothes when they're done drying because you're taller than her. Don't tell her I said this, but your mommy's kinda short." She whispered, making her giggle. 

Violet picked the small girl up and held her close to her chest as she cuddled her, stroking through her locks, she turned to see her wife coming into the room.

"You're gonna need to sleep with me tonight, Ev. I'll give your sheets a proper clean tomorrow, okay?" She reached out for the girl, taking her in her arms, she sighed and sat down on the bed. "You're getting heavy. When did you get so big?"

"Who knows?" Violet asked rhetorically as she watched her wife cuddle their daughter for what she didn't know would be the last time in a long time.

-

"You need to be careful!" Louis shouted at the blonde as she ducked beneath the trenches. He grabbed his gun, tossing it over to her. "Be careful, Vi!" He growled at the blonde. Ever since they'd arrives at the beach, Violet hadn't taken it seriously at all - Louis swore it was her nerves kicking up, but he couldn't risk it.

"I am!" She shouted back through the sounds of bullets and shouting that filled the air. Violet ducked again as a bullet shot at her, hitting the metal behind her. "Shit," She muttered, "Have you got another gun?"

"Is it busted?"

"Yeah," Violet said, dropping it beside her, she closed her eyes as she lay hidden from them. Violet grunted in frustration. "They gave me all the busted shit, they don't want me out of this alive."

Louis looked over to her, regret in his eyes. "You need to go home, Vi. You're risking too much here."

"I'm here, aren't I? Just fucking get I over with."

"Violet, you are not the hero who's going to save the world from this war, you need to go home and be with your family. Be with your wife, and your girls."

"My girls won't have a life, they won't have a family or a wife to come home to if there's still a war!" Violet replied with a hiss as the rage started to kick in. Violet cocked the gun again, resting it on the wood, she aimed before noticing something. "Louis, get down!" 

He ducked, just missing the bullet by less than six inches. Violet let out a deep breath and turned to face the gun again, she started to shoot but even that wouldn't half her best friend from voicing his insecurities about her.

"Go home!" He ordered again. "Withdraw! Leave! Evie needs you! Hope needs you! Clementine needs you! They don't want you to fight the war for them, they want you to be there with them! Please!"

Violet turned to swear at him again before she stopped. A thought coming to her head. A memory, even...

"I don't want to ever have to tell our girls that you're not coming home. So please don't ever go that far away from us again." She recalls her wife telling her those words.

Violet's heart pounded in her chest at the thought of her wife, home alone with their daughters, all three anxious about the unknown, unaware if Violet was alive or not. Evie and Hope not understanding why she had left in the first place, and Clementine knowing exactly why she was gone.

She couldn't determine which was worse. Either way - both the twins and Clem knew there was a chance Violet wouldn't be home. 

It didn't stop Clementine from cooking an extra bit more during dinner, just in case Violet did come home, though.

Violet took a deep breath. "I need to go home." She said. "Please, please, I need to go home-"

"We're moving base!" Louis shouted at her, grabbing her arm. "We'll get you home after - come on!" 

Violet reluctantly agreed, after all, she was in the middle of a war, what choice did she have? Allowing her best friend to pull her the rest of the way - she couldn't shake the thoughts of her wife and baby girls from her head.

She wondered how angry Evie and Hope would be that she didn't come back.

Or, that she did.

-

The wind whispered quietly as the grass rustled along the length of the farm. Strawberries freshly planted in the ground, nowhere near blooming as Louis stepped over them with anxiety. The grass was long and full, but nearly trimmed from the last time Violet was home. He clutched the piece of paper to his chest as he approached to yard of the farm.

He made his way out of the long grass and approached the porch of the home where Clementine stood, hanging up what he presumed to be some pictures the girls had drawn. She usually hung them in the porch so that people could see them when they were coming in. 

As she turned around, she was surprised to see him standing there, but as she noticed what he was holding, her heart sunk further into her stomach. She covered her mouth.

"No..."

He swallowed. "The Secretary of War desires me to express his deepest regret that your wife, and mother, Staff Soldier Violet Everett, has been reported dead in action since the ninth of June, over at our branch at Kilula beach. If further details or information are received, you will be promptly notified. Signed, the general."

The brunette shut her eyes tightly as tear spilled out of them, she took in gasps of air as she pressed both her hands flat against each other and shook her head. 

"P-Please read it again, she's missing, right? Missing in action."

He looked down. "I'm sorry, Clem."

"Stop, you," She struggled, "The, the girls are in the strawberry field, I have to go, I, I need,"

"Clementine, I can bring them to you." He offered but she shook her head at him before taking a deep breath and sitting down on the porch to try and wait it out.

"Oh, oh my god," She gasped for sure once more, "Do you have her stuff? Medals? Uniform, her ring? Her, her wedding ring?"

"They never recovered a body."

"Then, then, h-how do you know?" She asked him, "How do you know that she's dead?!"

He sighed, taking out a picture and handing it to the brunette who unfolded it with tears in her eyes. "There's a bullet hole."

"Our, our wedding p-photo,"

"I'm sorry..."

-

Clem stood out on the porch, tears streaming down her face as she watched her girls pick strawberries in the field just behind the barn. She shuddered out a breath as she slowly made her way towards the girls. Louis was long gone home now, and he had taken Violet's medal with him. The only one Clementine had left, she decided he needed it more.

Her soft heals crunched the grass beneath them as she walked the little pathway into the grass, just in time for Hope to notice her. She walked the few steps closer with a smile.

"What are you girls doing, then? Catch any ladybugs?" She bent down slightly with a grin as they both began to speak at the same time.

"Evie caught one! But it flew away!"

"Ya!" Evie replied through her toothless grin. Clementine chuckled sadly, wiping a stray tear from her cheek.

"I'm sorry girls, that happens. Even if you offer the ladybug the best life it could ever have, it will still have to go away. Some things are just too beautiful to stick around." She kissed the top of their curly heads before stroking both their cheeks at the same time. 

“Momma?" Hope's voice pulled her from her teary eyed daydream. "Is mommy coming home soon?"

Clementine bit her lip, shaking her head, she kissed Hope's forehead again to try and stifle her tears. “No baby. Mommy… Mommy’s not coming home.” She said shakily.

“Is she coming tomorrow?” Evie asked confusedly. "For strawberries?"

“No. I mean," She struggled, taking both of their small hands and holding them on her lap, she tried to stop sobbing as she kissed both of their hands. "Mommy's not going to be coming back, girls, I'm so, so, so, so sorry."

"Why?" Hope asked. "Mommy said she'd be home, momma? Momma?"

Clementine sobbed more and pulled them both in for a hug, kissing both of their heads as she held them closely. “She’s staying a-and she’s gonna keep us safe from the bad guys. I’m so, so sorry girls. I know, I know it must be so confusing for you but it's not any better for me."

“B-But I want mommy to come back...? Pease?"

"I want her to come back, too. Believe me." She whispered into their clothes as she rubbed both their backs. "She loved you both so much, you know that?" They pulled away for a moment and she cupped Hope's cheeks. "The night you were born, she didn't sleep, she stayed awake looking at your faces to make sure you were really ours. And it's not a lie when I tell you she's done the same thing every night since then. You two are her pride and joy and I know, I know that she's thinking about you both right now, okay? Don't you ever think your mommy's staying away for any reason other than wanting to protect you."

"Will we ever see her again?" Evie's chest heaved. "Can we see her on Sunday at Grandma's? Is she staying with Gaga?"

"Oh baby, I, I wish we could, I really, really do..." She said as the smaller girl wrapped her arms around her waist and refused to let go, crying into her shirt. "Evie, shhhh, shhh, it's okay,"

"I want to see mommy!"

"Can we use the phone for her?" Hope questioned the brunette who just shook her head, pulling her in for a hug.

"Mommy's gone, girls. We're not going to see her again. I'm so, so, so sorry."


	2. I can't always just forget her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But she could try

It was a warm, windy day, Violet noted as she walked down the path from the porch towards the field. The golden haze of the setting sun overlayed the farm land and she took in a deep breath of fresh air as she walked towards the long grass, parted in the middle to allow a walk way. She turned to smile at her wife, who stood with her feet on the steps of the porch, Evie in one arm as she held Hope's hand for guidance. Violet grinned.

"Good job, Hopey!" She called out. "You got down the steps yourself!" She crouched, outstretching her arms for the small girl who ran towards her clumsily and wrapped her arms around her. Violet chuckled, kissing her head as her wife caught up with them and the blonde stood up, kissing her wife's lips.

"You ran off and left me with both of them." The brunette said, tangling her fingers between her wife's as they walked up the path. "Do you have Hope's inhaler in your bag, by any chance?" Clementine then questioned, using her free hand to pat her jeans. "I swore I put it in my pocket."

"It's in my backpack, yeah." Violet replied, stroking through her daughter's golden locks as they reached the strawberry field. "Okay girls, what was the rules?" Violet questioned her daughters who just looked at her with no interest, Evie busy with chewing her fingers. Violet rolled her eyes in a playful manner.

"Evie gets three strawberries, Hope gets three and mom's get two each, isn't that right?"

"Es!" Hope replied. Violet grinned, leaning down, Hope's shoes hitting the dirt path as she began to tear off into the field. 

"Honey, be careful! Your boots don't fit!" 

"Come on, Ev." The brunette tried to put Evie down but she clinged to her shirt. She furrowed her brows, pressing her hand against her forehead to check for her temperature. "Are you feeling okay? She feels very hot."

"She's been running around all day and it's summer, that's all." Violet said, reaching out to pick up her daughter. "How about I give you a piggyback?" She suggested, sitting her onto her shoulders as her wife panicked. 

"That's not a piggyback, that's dangerous!"

"She's fine!" Violet said, holding Evie's legs as she walked off, following Hope. "You coming, babe?"

Clementine shook her head, a smirk. "You're such an ass."

"And you love it." Violet said as she ran off, catching up with Hope. Clementine watched from afar as Violet shifted Evie, now holding her in her arms as she bent down to examine the strawberries their other daughter was putting into her basket. Violet and Hope were talking, and Clementine didn't know what they were saying, but she didn't need to.

She never thought things would be like this. That she'd watch her wife with their two daughters, twins, on their farm, picking strawberries. It wasn't a life she had given much thought to and she definitely didn't expect to live on a farm - but she remembers how Violet's face lit up when she saw it listed for sale in the newspaper one morning. It was old and run down but most of all - cheap. Being able to dress it up the way it fit their narrative, that was amazing.

She slowly started to walk down the path, fixing her belt as she made her way towards the girls. By the time she caught up, Hope had already ran further on and Evie was near asleep in Violet's arms. Still, the blonde held three baskets and managed to give one to her wife.

"Do you want me to take your basket?"

"I got it." Violet said as they walked.

"How are you gonna pick strawberries with your hands full?" She questioned rhetorically, taking the basket from her wife's hands as they walked. Hope still ran slightly ahead and soon enough Evie decided she wanted to follow her, prompting Violet to let her down with her own basket in hand. Violet wrapped her free arm around her wife's shoulder and pulled her in closely.

"We need to get Hope some new boots, seriously, because she is absolutely going to fall over in them." Violet chuckled as she rubbed up and down her wife's arm. "What are you thinking about?"

The brunette, staring idly at their daughters from afar as her arms are wrapped around Violet's torso, looks up at the blonde in curiosity and hums.  
"Hm?" She responds through eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"You're quiet. Are you tired?"

"Yeah, I guess." She replied. "I'm tired of having to drive an hour away to get the girls to preschool in the morning. I'm thinking we ought to just take them out."

"If that's what you want." Violet said as they walked. The sound of their daughters laughing together pulled her out of her thoughts. "I've been thinking about the war."

"What about it?"

"I think it's going to get worse."

"Yeah, but we're safe. We live in a secluded place. All we need to do is get the girls to school and get our groceries. We're gonna be fine."

"But we have all this land," Violet gestured to the grass and dividers covering them. "They could absolutely drop bombs into the grass and we wouldn't even know."

"They're not supposed to harm the civilians."

"Clem," Violet stopped, letting go of her wife's hand, she walked in front of her. "They're doing this to take over. Of course they're going to hurt civilians."

"Violet, just drop it. I get that this is your passion but I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"This isn't just my passion, it's a reality." Violet said with a sigh, "You know what it means if the war extends over here."

"Of course I know what it means, and I don't want to think about it like I already said." She stated in a stern tone. "The girls don't need to hear any of this either, okay? They don't even know what a war is."

"And I'm trying to make sure they never have to know," Violet looked at her wife before her wife's attention was grabbed by something else.

"Is that Louis?" She questioned. Violet turned her head and narrowed her eyes at the body slumping through the field. She started to smile as her came closer, Evie and Hope following, they ran up to their moms to greet him.

As he got closer, Violet and Clementine made a connection and a realization hit them. He looked at them both, he had been crying, this they knew. He spoke.

"She's dead." He said. "She died on the beach. Right in front of me. Like... like three meters away from me. I could've just stepped out and it could've been me instead."

"Tell me you're lying. Right now." Violet said. She bit her lip. "Open your mouth, you're lying, right? Please?"

His voice was broken. "Why would I lie...?"

Violet shook her head as Evie buried her face against her mom's thigh. Violet rubbed her back, the unbelievable shock on her face as her wife very slowly put her hands on her shoulders.

"Vi..."

"Oh my god."

-

Violet sat on the porch of the home, staring out with Evie on her lap. It was night time now, dark across the field. She sniffled slightly, stroking her daughters hair as the small girl lay into her. The door opened to the house and her wife stepped out with a mug in hand, she took a seat beside her and placed it on the table. 

"Hope's gonna watch a movie in a while if you want to, too, Ev." The brunette's voice was soft as she watched her daughter snuggle into her wife.

"No," She replied. Violet kissed her head through teary eyes.

"You can go with Hopey. I'm okay." Violet said in a broken voice as she rubbed her daughters back. Evie furrowed her brows as Clementine stood up and picked her up, cradling her before putting her to her feet.

"Go on inside baby, I'll keep mommy safe." She smiled softly, finally convincing Evie to go inside. The small girl ran inside begrudgingly as Clementine and Violet watched. Once she was out of sight, the blonde hicced slightly and caught her wife's attention.

"I just don't know how I feel." Violet broke down. "Because it doesn't seem real, it's just words right now, but I know eventually it won't be that way and it hurts really bad."

"I know, honey." She said, putting her hand on her knee. "You're allowed to be sad but you can't sit out here in the dark alone, you have to talk about things."

"I didn't want Ev seeing me cry, I didn't want her to worry, I just, you know."

"Evelyn is strong." Clementine told her. "She can handle that, okay? She just wants to make sure you're okay." She told her as Violet nodded.

"Can we talk about something else? I don't, I want to think of something happy right now. I don't want to think of sad things."

"Do you promise you'll talk to me about everything tonight, when the girls are asleep?"

"I promise."

The brunette nodded, standing up, she wrapped her arms around her wife's shoulders and sitting beside her on the bench. "You know I love you, okay?"

"I, I, know."

"And you know the girls are okay. Don't worry about them. Just be open with your feelings." She rubbed her back as Violet sat up, taking the brunette's hand, she stood up. Violet wrapped her arms around her wife's body with a large sigh, she snuggled her face into her shoulder. 

"I love you, you know." She said, kissing her cheek. Her wife patted her back before pulling away from the hug and taking her hand, leading her inside.

"Let's go watch a movie with the girls." 

Violet nodded tearfully, allowing her wife to lead her into their home. As they stepped inside the screen door, Clementine closed it over, locking it after as she held onto Violet's hand.

She turned to the blonde, pressing her lips to the blonde's, her palm flag against her chest. Violet kissed back lightly, smiling before she pulled away.

"What was that?"

"Just a gentle reminder." She grinned.

-

As Hope and Evie held hands, Hope's free hand clinged onto her mother's arm as she lead them to the tree left of the barn. She held a box in her hands, leading her two babies with her, she approached the tree through the golden grass with ease. 

Approaching the tree, Hope let go of her mother's skirt and held her sisters hand tightly as Clementine sat onto her knees, dusting off the box.

"These were your mommy's photographs," She began, wiping stray tears, "There's pictures of her at military camp, pictures of you and her when you two were babies, her whole life documented in here. I'm going to leave them here in a box."

"Can mommy see them from heaven?" Evie asked as she clung anxiously to her teddy bear.

"Of course she can." The brunette said, standing up. Her eyes lingered for a moment before she wiped her cheeks again and turned around, pulling her girls close for a hug. "You guys are so crazily strong, you're so brave. I'm so proud of you... I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you two keeping me safe."

"I don't like it when mommy's not here," Hope whispered, "I really want her to come home, momma."

"So do I, baby, I really do, you don't know what I'd give to bring your mother back."

"Can't I go instead?"

"She would never want that," She said, pulling away from the hug, she cupped her daughters face. "She's keeping us safe, remember?"

"But I... keep her safe...?"

"You need to keep me safe, okay?" She kissed Hope's head, then Evie's, and took both hands as she walked them back up to the house. "Now, I think we should make some cake, what about you? Ev can help me back and you both can decorate them after, what do you think?"

"Can I make some decorations?" Hope asked. Clementine furrowed her brows in confusion as she swung both girls joyfully.

"Decorations for what?"

"For the barn."

"Mmm, that depends. You know those baby lambs can't have fairy lights all around the barn again. Mommy might've thought they were cute, but the sheep sure didn't."

"But we don't have lambs anymooooore." She whined as they walked up to the steps of the porch. "Can I do some painting then?"

"I think you should go out in the backyard and jump on the trampoline, blow off some of that anger, you have your mother's temper." She said, leaning down to fix her jacket collar around her neck as Evie ran inside.  
"We can paint tomorrow. All three of us, I'll get those big sheets of paper and put them on the grass, how about that?"

"Yeah..."

"Hopey, I know you miss mommy. But she would want us to keep going. As hard as it is and as much as I would so much rather just give up, she wouldn't want that. If it had happened to me, she'd keep going, so I have to do it for her. Will you please try stay with me on this? I know it's confusing and you're sad and angry, but... please?"

"You're not gonna leave me too, are you?"

"No sweetheart, never." She kissed her forehead before wiping down her jacket.

"You're creasing my clothes." Hope said in the same tone of voice her mother had used all those months ago. Clementine swallowed dryly and patted her jacket again, standing up.

"Go inside baby, it's getting cold, okay?"

"Okay." She ran inside behind her sister, the door closed over as soon as it had opened and Clementine sniffled as she wiped her eyes with the back of her thumbs. She shook, trying to calm herself down when footsteps were heard printing the ground. Clementine snapped her head in the direction and wiped her eyes immediately as she began to walk down the steps.

"You're not supposed to be here. The girls don't need to see you." She said harshly. Louis looked at her tiredly and shook his head, reaching out to give the brunette something. She looked at him, angry, and furrowed her brows.

"I don't need your handouts. We don't need charity, we're fine."

"Clem," He began, putting it into her hands. "Just look at it." He said sharply. Clementine furrowed her brows at him before unfolding the piece of paper and looking at it thoroughly.

"What is this, a joke?" She asked, "Why did you give this to me?"

"24608." He said. "It's Violet's registered number."

"And?"

"It was found." He said as her eyes grew in size and she looked down at the paper to study it once more. In Kilula. It turned up miles away from the beach, where they claimed Violet would've died. Her dog tag was found with it but it's being examined."

"What does-" She stopped, staring at the tattered piece of paper. "There's a date on it?"

"12th of June." He nodded.

"That's three days after she was reported dead." Clementine said in disbelief. "Is she alive?"


	3. but she could try

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You've never been in love, you wouldn't understand."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I say this every time I post but I'm sorry for being inactive I'm severely depressed at the moment and am processing a lot of shit so I've had a block but I'm excited to get this story moving as it is going to be a RIDE pls enjoy

The sound of heavy boots against the wooden floor of the porch echoed through the home. Hope and Evie were in bed by now as Louis slowly walked into the bedroom, not wanting to make any noise and disturb them. Clementine looked at him and scoffed.

"My uncle will be over in two hours, I'm not leaving until he gets here. I've booked my plane ticket, I leave in the morning." She said as she stuffed a charger into her bag. He walked over, putting his hand on her suitcase and halting her actions, she looked at him.

"Kilula is a fucking warzone, Clem."

"I don't care, I'm flying out to Austria I'm the morning and I'll drive to Kilula if I have to. I need to find her. You wouldn't understand." She said, zipping up her case before walking to the closet and getting on her knees, she pulled out a small box. "She's my wife, who I've been with since we were seventeen, and if you think I'm about to give up on my chance to find her and bring her home, you're wrong."

"How do you intend to bring her home safe if you're blown to pieces!?"

She looked up at him - "You're acting like I don't have any training in this sort of thing!"

"You have combat training! Not bombs or firearms, you can't go out there! Do Hope and Evie really need to lose you both?"

"Stop it!" She stood up, losing her balance slightly, "Don't, don't use them against me they're... they're my-"

"Clem, you're pale."

"Don't fucking! Don't, just..." She shook her head as he held onto her shoulder, walking her over to the bed where he sat her down for a moment. The brunette shook her head as tears welled in her eyes.

"I need to find her. It has to be me. I want her to come home, I want the girls to not hate me anymore, I want her to be here and with me. I have to bring her home."

"You need to sit down."

"I'm fine!"

"Minerva told me you blacked out at work today, so you're clearly not." He said as she quieted down. "So, it's true then?"

"Minerva probably made it seem worse than it was. I got dizzy and sat down, that's all."

"What happens when you're in the middle of nowhere and get dizzy and sit down?" He asked her. "Violet made me promise to protect you and the girls if she died."

"But she's not dead! You're officially released from your duties, go!" She waved him off.

He shook his head before turning away. It was quiet before he started to walk away, down the steps of the stairs and out of the home. Clementine listened as the door of the house shut before tears welled in her eyes, she shook them away and continued to pack.

-

Clementine hauled the suitcase into the back of the car before stomping through the mud and towards the other side of the car. Opening the door, she started to take out the car seats and sat them on the ground by the wheels.

"The girls want to know where you're going," Lee said to the brunette who stopped what she was doing, closing her eyes.

"I'm going up to them, I have to pack."

"What are you bringing?" He walked closer to the brunette.

"Just stuff, my clothes, toothbrush, charger. Bringing Vi's wolf, too. Just so she can feel comfortable on the way home. I have some clean clothes packed for her, I have her phone and her headphones so she can listen to music and-"

"Clementine." He said. "You know that you're not gonna find her, right?"

"How about you shut up, okay?" She said simply. "Just shut up. You've never loved anyone, what would you know? She could be looking for me right now. She needs to be with her family."

"You can't go alone."

"Well, who's coming with me? Everyone believes she's dead!" She spat when a car drove into the yard of the farm and her uncle stood awkwardly, as he knew what was about to happen. The car, much fancier than Clementine's, pulled up, and within a few seconds the driver stood out.

"Oh no. Nuh uh. Absolutely not. I'm not bringing her with me, Violet, she... she'll flip!" She said as the woman walked towards them.

Minerva grinned at the brunette who crossed her arms, looking off to the side. "Hey, look. I offered to come. Violet's missing, she went missing from Kilula, so did Sophie. Maybe I'll find her?"

"Sure. Because you care so much about your sister."

"I do care about her. And I care about you and Violet and I want her back as much as you do, okay?" She said with narrowed eyes. There was silence for a moment before Minerva sat into Clementine's car uninvited. The brunette was about to protest before the redhead spoke.   
"Go say goodbye to the girls, I'll be here." 

Clementine didn't say a word, crossing her arms over her chest, she turned around swiftly and gave Lee a glare before stomping up the steps of the porch and into the home. 

She stepped into the house and as she began to walk up the stairs, she was met with her two girls sitting together, wrapped around each other as if they were babies. The brunette felt tears well in her eyes but pushed them back, they didn't need to see her cry.

"Why are you two up? It's almost nine." She asked as she got to them on the steps, she flattened her skirt out before taking a seat between the two girls who looked solemn. "What's wrong, girls?"

"You're leaving!" Hope said. "You're leaving us like mommy!"

"Hey, no I'm not." She said softly, taking both of their hands in her own. "I won't be gone long. It's just a work trip."

"But mommy was on a work trip, too..." Evie's confused voice said as she felt her eyes fill with tears. The smaller girl wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist. "Please don't go, I hate it when you're not here because it's scary and Hope's always mean to me! She tells me that you won't come back!"

"No I don't!"

"You better not!" The brunette told her before wrapping both of her arms around Evie's smaller form and hugging her closely and rubbing up and down her arms. "Evie, I'm coming home, okay? I promise you. Two days, max. That's all I'll go for."

"But, but, can I come? Please? I'll be really good, you won't even know I'm there!" She begged. The woman's eyes filled with tears again as she sat her youngest daughter on her knee.

"Evie, when I come back I'll take you and Hope on a vacation, okay? We can go somewhere warm with beaches. Does that sound good?" 

"No, I don't want to go to the beach, I wanna stay with you!"

"You promised we could paint tomorrow and you said you'd never ever leave me and now you're leaving me!"

"Hope," She paused as she sifted through the words in her mind, "it's just not that easy, okay? I'd love to take you guys with me but it's too dangerous."

"Why are you going somewhere dangerous? Please just stay here and play with us!"

"You'll have so much fun with your uncle, Ev. You guys don't have to go to school until I'm home, okay?" She kissed her head before turning to kiss Hope's. "Come on, let's get you two to bed."

"Mommy, please don't leave us." Hope asked her as she wrapped herself around the brunette. "I don't want to be here without you."

"Hope, I won't even be gone that long, I promise. You can stay in your pyjama's and watch movies all day long while I'm gone." She promised the girl who was as stubborn as Violet, refusing to budge.

"I don't want to watch movies. I only like them with you, please? Can you stay for tonight?"

"I'm so sorry bunnies, but I have to get going. I'm gonna call you as soon as I get to the airport and when I get to Austria." She kissed both of their heads again, staying cuddling both of her girls on the stairs before they fell asleep and she carried them up to her and Violet's room, letting them sleep in her bed before she set off at last.

-

The sounds of the ocean as the tide blew in and out were enough to deafen anyone, but as the body lay cold against the rocks, it was unmoving. Unable to wake up, even to such a strong sound.

"Hey! What are you doing down there!?" A voice yelled upon seeing the body. It took a few seconds before eyes slowly peeled open, solid green, she stared at the sky unable to move.

"I'm..." She could hardly speak, "... I need to go home..."

-

Clementine sat anxiously, tapping her foot against the floor of the taxi. They'd landed earlier than they thought, and by now Hope and Evie would be asleep. The brunette wanted nothing more than to hold them right now - but she couldn't even call them.

"I'm sure we'll find h-"

"Why are you here, Minerva? Be honest."

"I wanted to help." She said quietly. Clementine shook her head before turning to look out of the window, tears in her eyes before she looked at her again.

"No, no, you don't." She said harshly. "I don't want any bullshit, Minerva, I wanna get home to my daughters with my wife." She told the redhead who nodded her head profusely. Clementine softened up and turned away slightly again.

"I promise I only want to help."

"Okay." She muttered before sighing deeply and looking out the window intensely. "I've never been outside of home." She said. "Now I'm halfway across the world. Evie and Hope must be so confused."

"Louis will check in on them," Minerva then said, "I'm gonna guess they don't know you're looking for Violet?"

She shook her head. "I couldn't give them hope like that. I worry about Hopey. We named her that because of how sweet she was when we had her first, always seemed like she was comforting Evie. Saying, don't lose hope. She took so long to name and it felt so perfect at the time. Now she's bitter, angry. She's hurting."

"She's not a bad kid, Clem."

"I know she's not bad. But nobody else knows that. Everyone's drilling it into my brain, send her away! Send her to Ericsons, like mother like daughter, right? That's... That's such bullshit. She's five. Five! What five year old could possibly benefit from being stuck in a place like that when she could be at home with her family?"

"Is it Vi's family telling you that?"

"Yeah."

"You know not to listen to them," The redhead stated as she leaned her elbow against the window. "They feel guilty for giving Vi away and now they want you to do the same with Hope, and you're not going to."

"I know I'm not, I wouldn't dream of it." She said honestly before sighing. "It's just hard to cope..." She uttered as the taxi pulled up at the hotel. Clementine took a deep breath as Minerva undid her seatbelt, only to stop and look at the brunette.

"You don't look great, you feeling okay? I know it's scary... where we are... but Kilula's on the coast, we're safe here."

"I'm fine." She lied. "Just nauseous. Anxious."

"Okay, you get the bags and I'll get us signed in."

"Okay." She uttered.

Clementine grabbed the suitcase from the car, along with Minerva's handbag before she walked into the hotel. It wasn't great looking - harsh grey walls with cracks showing and dirty glass panels of glass as windows - but it didn't look so bad inside.

She got to the lobby, expecting Minerva to be still signing in but she was already done, walking towards the brunette.

"There's two beds. Don't worry."

"I wasn't worrying. Nothing on earth would get me into bed with you," She handed the redhead her handbag as they began walking up the stairs. "How do we get to Ki-"

"Shhh! These people are at war, Clem! You don't want them to hear you." Minerva scolded her as they walked towards the door, the redhead taking out their key and swiping it. Once it beeped, she opened the door and they walked in. 

The room was small, but there was still enough space for the both of them to live comfortably for a few days - though Clementine would've preferred separate rooms - she couldn't complain. She dragged her case to one of the beds and set it on it as Minerva made herself comfortable.

The redhead sprawled out on her bed, immediately attempting to connect to the wifi, whereas Clementine took Violet's favorite wolf toy from her suitcase and cuddled it.

"The WiFi here is shit." Minerva then said, causing the brunette to scoff.

"Do you think I care about the wifi? I'm here to find my wife." She said, squeezing the wolf closer to her and taking a deep breath. "It smells like her. Like cinnamon and strawberries. I would do anything to get her back."

"I know you would. Because you flew out here within mere hours of knowing that she may be alive. That's proof enough for me," the redhead rolled over to face the brunette. "That's her wolf."

"Please don't touch it," She said, "I don't want her scent to leave it. She didn't let anyone touch it, only the girls when they were babies could sleep beside it. It's her favorite thing."

"I know. I won't touch it..." Minerva said, easing off for a moment before the brunette cleared her throat.

"How do we get to Kilula?"

"There's trains. We're gonna have to disguise ourselves. Military personnel only." Minerva said as she unbuckled her belt, much to the brunette's dismay.

"Minerva,"

"Shut up, I'm not doing that." She rolled her eyes, pulling out a card. "Name tag. Has codes and shit, the receptionist knows me." Minerva said. 

Clementine nodded, biting her lip anxiously as she watched the redhead stand up and fidget, walking around the room in search of something.

"Do you think we'll find her?"

"I hope so." Minerva said as she got on her knees, looking underneath the bed.

"What time is it?"

"Two in the morning, we should think about sleeping soon."

"What?? But Vi-"

"Clementine," Minerva shook her head, pulling a case from under the bed. "If we're going to look for her, we need to be completely sensible. That means sleep, eat, shower, okay? We have limited time here." She said as she unclipped the suitcase and looked inside with a grin. "Having connections worked out. These are our clothes for tomorrow, receptionist brought them in. When we wake up, we'll put them on and go look for her, is that a plan?"

"Okay..." Clementine muttered as she looked at the wolf in her arms and tears slowly filled her eyes. "I need to get her back." 

"You will. And we'll get Sophie. We can go back to how everything was." Minerva said before she flicked off the light. "Get some sleep."

"You too."

-

The click of the gun was enough to wake the brunette up as she stirred lazily, turning in the bed to face Minerva who presumably was unaware that she was awake. The redhead clicked the bullets into the clip before looking at the brunette who's eyes opened slowly again. 

"Come on, we have to go. Train leaves at eight, it's seven now. We have enough time to eat."

"I don't care about food," Clementine sat up in the bed and reached for her phone, "I need to call Hope and Ev," She tiredly rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as the redhead threw a camoflauge jacket to her.

"Hurry up." Minerva ordered a she started to pack away everything else, slipping the gun under her belt and partially under her jeans before closing over her jacket to cover the rest of it up.

"Hi girls!" The brunette's voice was higher now as she tried to appear happier to her daughters. "It's late there, I didn't think you'd be awake," 

"We're playing Mario kart!" Evie yelled excitedly to the brunette.

"At five in the morning? Did you guys sleep at all?" She questioned worriedly. Hope shook her head, about to answer when Evie took the phone herself and brought it with her. Clementine smiled broadly, her daughter unable to properly show her mom the angles and giving the brunette the perfect view of her chin and chest.

"I'm the princess," She said to her, unaware the brunette couldn't see the screen, "I'm the orange one because and Hope's the lizard."

"His name is Yoshi!"

"That's great Ev, are you going to sleep soon though?" She asked her with furrowed brows. "Where's uncle? Can I talk to him?"

"He's outside," Evie said to her mom, waving at the camera excitedly. "You look pretty!"

She smiled again, "Thank you honey, where's your sister? Are you guys being good? No fighting?"

"Hope fell outside!"

"What?!" The brunette felt panic set in, "Is she okay? Where was Lee?"

"I hurt my knee," Hope said, trying to pull down her tights to show her mom, "he was on a call."

"Are you okay, Hopey? Did he take care of you? I'll call him later..." She muttered threateningly before looking at Minerva who gestured to her watch, silently telling her she had to hurry up. The brunette nodded. "Listen, I have to go-"

"Noooo!" Both girls whinged, "are you coming home today?"

"Not today, no..."

"Tomorrow?"

"...I know I said two days, but it might be a little longer, okay? Three days max. I'm gonna be home soon and we can start decorating for Halloween a few weeks early and we can carve pumpkins together, hey, you can pick them out of the patch tomorrow if you want! How's that sound?"

"You promised you'd come home tomorrow!"

"I know I did, I'm sorry." She bit her lip to try and fight back the tears. "Listen you two, you know I love you so much, okay? I'm coming home the second I can. And it'll be us again, okay? The way it's supposed to be."

"Why can't you come home?" Her heart was practically being pulled back and forth by the girls on the end of the phone and the woman lost in the country she'd flown to. "Why did you have to go? You've never gone before!"

"It's scary for me too. But what keeps me going is knowing my girls are at home and waiting for me to come back, okay? So I'm gonna come back as soon as I can and give you both the biggest hugs imaginable, is that okay?"

"Fiiiiiine!" Hope said as Evie blew kisses through the phone.

"I love you two!"

"Love you mommy!"

Once the call had ended, the brunette solemnly clicked off her phone and stuffed it into her pocket before slipping into the jacket Minerva had thrown to her.

"Where are we going to go exactly?" She asked as both her and Minerva left the hotel room and started walking towards the stairs, the brunette stuffed the hem of her shirt into her pants. 

"Got a train, I know the coordinates to where to go. We'll find a proper disguise their. We need to look like we belong."

"Do you think they have Violet?"

"They could, but probably not. If they had her, they most likely wouldn't have let her dog tag go missing." Minerva said as they walked down the stairs, through the lobby, they headed towards the door.

"We need firearms. A handgun isn't gonna fool them."

"We'll figure it out." She said as they walked out of the hotel and Minerva lead the brunette down the block. Clementine struggled to speak.

"Min, Minerva, can you slow down? I'm feeling dizzy,"

"It's because you haven't eaten," She stopped, turning around the grip the brunette before she fell, "woah there, okay. Can you just, stand for a minute?"

"I'm fine..." She said, gripping her hand, "yeah, yeah... just let's go."

They walked together towards the train station, with Minerva supporting the brunette to the best of her abilities. Clementine's dizziness did fade - but her hope for finding Violet didn't even waver.


	4. no don't tell me now that I don't want it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm stupid, I'm so fucking stupid, I, I knew!"

Clementine pulled the camoflauge print jacket over her shoulders, shifting slightly to try and buckle the belt around her waist as the redhead took a scissors from the pile in front of them and began to snip off parts of her hair. 

"I don't get why you're making me cut my hair," The brunette complained, "Violet didn't have to cut her hair."

"They made her tie it, we can tie yours." Minerva replied, taking a snip of the brunette's curls. "It'll grow back."

"How do I explain this to my kids?"

"Just tell them it's been this way for a while, not like they'll know with you wearing a hat all the time anyways." She said, brushing through her hair before the brunette turned around. 

"Evelyn can't handle change, I better not look too different." She said, touching her hair. "Are you gonna cut yours?"

"Mines short enough." She said, fixing her jacket before looking down at the pile of clothes on the floor. "Are you in full uniform?"

Clementine nodded uncomfortably, pulling her jacket around her chest anxiously. Minerva noted this, eyes squinted from the sun.   
"You okay?"

"The belt won't fit me." She uttered. "I must've put on weight."

"Are you sure?" She said with furrowed brow, lifting the brunette's jacket slightly and putting her hands on her waist. "Hm, okay... You can have mine."

"I think the belts too, too, um, small..." Clementine said anxiously as Minerva began to tighten the belt. The smaller girl felt more than uncomfortable with how close her colleague was, letting out a deep sigh when she pulled away.  
"Thanks."

"Your belts the same size as the one you brought?" Minerva said. She now held Clementine's belt and was comparing it with the other one. "Maybe it's broken."

"Look, I was overeating a ton after my wife went missing and I had to raise our kids on my own and take over the family business. Sue me." She said to the redhead who held her hands up in defense. Minerva nodded before turning to grab the small bag from the ground and slinging it around her shoulders, both her and Clementine now walking towards the presumed base.

"How do we get in?"

"There's-"

"HEY!" A shout from above and both women held their hands up in defense, Clementine taking a deep breath and praying that the person hadn't seen them changing their clothes.

"We're the new recruits," Minerva gulped slightly, "From, from... Czech republic?"

"Where's your accent, hm?" She replied to the redhead who cursed under her breath. "American spies?"

"We're not spies," Clementine told her, "well, we are, but we work for you. We've been spying in America, that's where the accent comes from."

"Bullshit!"

"I-It's true!"

"Nah, it's bullshit, you're right." Minerva yelled up to the girl who held the gun in front of her and aimed it towards the brunette who was nearly on the verge of tears. "What's your name?"

"I'm not gonna fucking tell you."

"Okay, fine." Minerva pulled the gun from her belt and pointed it at her. "Tell me your name and position."

"I'm no-" the woman was cut off as the redhead lost patient, shooting a bullet right into her skull and watching as she fell face first, her gun and keycard fell from the roof and to the ground right in front of them. She grinned.

"Should've shot when you had the chance. And you were so pretty, too." Minerva walked over, picking up the keycard to examine it, she turned to look at Clementine. "I-"

"Do you think this is a fucking joke?!" She spat. "Are you serious? She had a gun pointed a-at my head, we're here to get my Violet, my wife! You're acting like this is funny!"

"I'm not!"

"I have a fucking family!" She said as tears started to well in her eyes and her lips wobbled. "I, I have kids, Minerva, they're,"

"Okay, okay, don't cry, I'm sorry," She bit her bottom lip as the brunette tried to suppress her emotions. "Clem, I'm sorry. I know this is serious. You know I love Hope and Evie," She said, reaching out to put a hand on the distressed brunette's shoulder before she harshly slapped it away.

"Don't!" She said in distress, wiping her eyes once more. "Just get me into that fucking base and get Violet out."

Minerva nodded, softening up. "Okay." She uttered before looking at the keycard again. "Her name's Florian, she's a general. I'm gonna be the leading commander from America, you're gonna be the new recruit. Stay behind me and don't talk, we don't have much time before they find her body."

"Okay." She nodded, watching Minerva scan the woman's keycard, praying that it worked before dropping it as the doors open and they both ran in before attaining position.

The next door opened and they weren't met with security. 

“Just follow my lead."

Minerva and Clementine ran slightly crouched , guns drawn, sticking to the crumbling walls of the buildings torn apart by bombs and bullets from the war.

Snaking through the war torn town they emerged from the buildings and found the compound which the girl had uttered moments before her death. The large sandstone walls decorated with flags of the enemy blew in the wind.

“Stop right there!” A yell, the others drawing their guns, Clementine fought the urge to draw her own and open fire on the people who took her love.

“Name and Identification number!”

“Commander Cherami Hutchinson, 9873181." Minerva yelled.

“Cleared, who’s the girl?” The officer asked again, cocking her gun towards Clementine. 

“She’s my subordinate, I’m training her." Minerva looked at her somewhat anxiously to try and figure out what she was running through the "widow's" head.

“Really? A commander training a rookie," She said with a quiet laugh, "Well, what's her name and ID, then?"

“Be cool, remember the story,” Minerva whispered beneath her breath. 

“Gideon Garcia, 1686456” Clementine shouted loudly.

“Fine, that check's out... So, why are you here? You're not from around here."

“We were sent to count the prisoners, get some proof of life for those we're trading. America has reason to believe you're not treating them... respectfully. They have to be in pristine condition to be traded."

“W-We didn’t get any notification of that?"

“Do you know how the war works honey? Sometimes letters just don't come through." Minerva shrugged.

“Alright, let them through," The guard spoke, buzzing the compound gate, the creaking of the clunky metal shuddering as the girls prepared themselves to hopefully see Violet.

The girls walked through the gate as one of the guards accompanied them. The sand crunching underneath, the guard kept his hands on his weapon and his eyes on the pair.

“Soldier? What is your business here? We're fine by ourselves."

“It’s just protocol, no less than three officers in the prisoner holding wing."

“Fine."

They walked through the compound and into the cool stone building, the dimly lit tunnel, with wires dangling from the walls, an orange haze cast in the eerie tunnel.

“So, what do you mean by proof of life?”

“We're just here to tell you which prisoners to send where, check on living conditions, and we're also looking for one in particular, a woman, blonde, green eyes, we were told that you had her captive. She's in her early thirties. We have reason to believe she's a spy." Minerva spoke calmly, unlike the brunette, a thin layer of sweat emerged on her forehead.

“Everett?” the guard questioned, Clementine gasped at the name and he looked at her. "Yeah, we had her anyway. She should still be here. Found her on Kilula beach." He stated, eyeing Clementine as her heart pounded in her chest.

“Is she okay?” He said, caution growing over the girls and their story. 

“She's fine." Minerva stared at her.

“Hmm... right, this way."

They continued to walk through the compound’s tunnel, one by one the cells appeared, their names scratched into the sheet metal cell, enough space to look into the small rooms.

Beaten, bruised and bloodied, screams could be heard from deeper in the compound, screams that made Clementine’s blood run cold. Would she recognize Violet's scream? Would Violet recognize her voice, should she call out for her?

Minerva pointed out the random prisoners, some wearing their countries colours. “These three, get a video of their names, date of births, units and send it to US-”

“-Anyone wearing the US uniform we need a video of.” 

Minerva looked at the man. "How do you sort the prisoners?"

"Year of birth."

"You got any 1990's?"

He nodded, and so did she.

"I want to see the prisoners born in 1990."

Cell after cell they waited in anticipation of finding Violet, eventually stopping at the cell, the scratched and scrawled at metal with her last name. Minerva grew angry at the sight of the empty cell as she slid open the small cover. 

“Where is the girl?” Minerva yelled, "You told me you had her!"

“I don’t know, I’m not in charge of this, probably to the other compound north of here”."

“Open the cell.” Clementine ordered, the clunking of the keys against the metal door as it creaked open, revealing the empty cell.

Clementine and Minerva stepped in the sandstone cell, the brunette breathed in the air, a faint smell of her lover still present, a tear rolled down her face at the comforting smell.

"She must've been here recently."

“Cle- Gideon, she was here,” Minerva spoke, picking up a scrap of paper on the floor, flipping it over revealing a torn and burnt edge photo of Clementine and Evie, placing it in her pocket.

“I think we’ve seen enough, let’s go." 

Clementine slowly walked out the room, stumbling as she did, catching her balance on the wall opposite.

“Is she okay? She looks pale.” The guard spoke to the two of them.

“I’m fine” She urged, not noticing the redheads expression.

“We’ll be going now, get the videos and send them, we’ll be back if you don’t."

As they slowly left the compound, the same way they entered they saw a guard looking at them speaking into the radio mounted on his shoulder.

As the clunky metal gate opened again they heard yelling, another officer started to run from behind.

They'd been caught.

“HEY! YOU, OVER THERE!"

“Clem, move it! Faster.” Minerva whispered, picking up their pace into a jog before it escalated into a full blown run.

“STOP WHERE YOU ARE!”

“Clementine, we need to move it!” She shouted, dragging the brunette’s arm moving them into a sprint much to the dizzier girls distaste.

“OPEN FIRE!”

They ran as fast as they could, dodging the bullets tearing through the air, colliding with the metal of the surrounding cars and the bricks of the buildings.

Running for their lives, weaving back the way they came, the sound gunfire becoming fainter and fainter. Clementine felt a sharp drag on her arm, pulling her behind a building. She had at first thought it was a bullet, but for once was relieved to find it was only Minerva. 

She leaned against the wall and then gripped her thighs, desperately sucking in air. 

“What the fuck are we going to do?” Clementine argued between heavy breaths, "She's not there and we can't, can't travel all around this place, it's a warzone, the kids, I..."

“We go home, talk to Louis, tell them that she’s not there, tell them that she’s in the other compound. Her regiment can take it from there. Now we know she's alive and she's been here recently, we don't have to risk our lives anymore." Minerva declared in a calm tone, looking at the girl still out of breath.

“But what about the other prisoners?”

“This isn't a fucking rescue mission, Clem, we're here to get Violet and Sophie. We can’t do anything apart from tell them that we found other soldiers and they’ll come get them. It’s a losing war, we’re winning, they’ll get rescued. It's not our problem.”

“Then what do we do?”

“You have a family, you need to go home and look after them," Minerva put a hand on her shoulder, "Violet's alive. You can tell the girls. This is the worst step out of the way, the next step is getting her home and you can all be together again."

“And what about you?”

“I’ll come back too, I’m not letting you leave alone, I saw you back there, you almost blacked out again." She furrowed her eyebrows at the brunette in concern, contemplating her next sentence. "I'm worried you're sick."

“I'm not sick, I just want my wife back-" She paused, “I love her, Minnie, and I can’t bear about what she’s going through." She choked out. "She was never supposed to be drafted like this. We were supposed to live on our farm with the kids for the rest of our lives and that would be it. She wasn't supposed to... to leave..."

“I know but this is not your place here, you need to look after the girls. They need you right now more than they have ever needed you. It's hard enough them being raised by one parent let alone none. I know it's hard filling Vi's role as well as your own, but you'll be together again soon. Right now, we need to get back to the hotel, make sure we're not being followed and YOU need to get food and some rest." She ordered, cocking her eyebrow at the brunette who sighed.

“Fine. Let’s go..." The brunette said defeatedly.

“CLEM, LOOK OUT!” The red head yelled after she turned around, spotting two men charging at them.

Minerva got tackled to the hround as the other man pinned her to the wall by her neck, she grunted and squirmed under the weight, putting her hand around his, the other punching his elbow to release his grip.

Maybe Louis was wrong. Combat training did help after all.

“You bitches really thought that you could sneak into our compound dressed as us. You fucking American Pigs!” He yelled, his anger coated by his thick accent.

“You’re the monster here, you kidnapped my wife!” Clementine grunted, getting out of the strong grip. She raised her fists at him, reading to beat them down as hard as she could.

“Oh, a fighter! You don’t really think you can win can you.” The unknown man said, preparing to bite the girl who kicked him in his stomach with her knee. Clementine threw a punch that landed square into his jaw. 

"I'm not playing fucking games!” She declared.

The assailant threw two more punches, the girl dodged them each time, throwing one more punch that hit her in the eye, she fell to the floor holding her face.

The man climbed on top of her and put his hands around her throat again, squeezing hard, her vision faded in and out, flashing back images of everything that had happened. Blacking out, being sweaty, putting on weight, losing her balance, feeling sick...

It all made sense in that moment.

All of a sudden she heard a deafening bang, a large weight on top of her and a high pitched ring in her ears.

“Oh my god, Clem are you okay?!” She heard Minerva say from what felt like a mile away, the red head pulled the now dead man from on top of her to the dusty floor. 

She once again sucked in air, her vision coming back to her, now able to see Minerva standing above her, she crouched down to beside the brunette, looking at her concerned.

“Clem?! Can you hear me?!” Minerva voiced

“...mhm..."

“Are you okay?”

“I’m pregnant.” Clementine spoke in a low tone, her voice raw and scratchy from being choked.

“What?!” Minerva practically yelled at the brunette. Clementine felt tears well in her eyes as she repeated the statement.

"I'm pregnant." She said again, sitting up and turning her body to the side, she dragged herself towards a nearby stone wall and rested her back against is as she buried her head between her knees. Minerva sat in the same position, looking at her, shocked.  
"I'm stupid, I'm so stupid, I shouldn't have come out here, I, I knew,"

"You knew?? You knew when you left America?"

"Not for sure," She said with a shaky breath. "I haven't seen any doctors or took a test or anything... but it makes sense now."

"Fucking hell." Minerva said, stumbling to her feet. "You're pregnant and you let me drag you into a fucking warzone! Oh my god!"

"I wanted to go into the warzone, this is on me." She said as she started to cry once more...

-

Clementine sat curled up on the bed in the hotel room, her hair wet from the shower and she shivered as the door opened and Minerva walked in with a plate from the lobby. She brought it towards the bed, sitting down beside the brunette and sighing.

"I don't want it."

"You need to eat."

"I don't want to eat." 

"Fucking eat." She pushed it towards the brunette again who took a deep breath, rubbing her eyes tiredly. Minerva spoke.

"I, uh, I got you this... while I was gone..." She reached into her pocket, pulling out a thin box, she threw it onto the bed in front of her. "The woman at the store said it was the best one. Really accurate, and stuff..."

Clementine stared at the box, though written in a different language, it was obvious what it was. She swallowed. "I don't think I want to know."

"I think we both already know, Clem."

"But if I don't know for sure, then there's a chance it might not be... you know?" She swallowed anxiously, eyes unmoving. "I can't... *can't* have a baby without Violet. I've never been a mom without her, not like this. The girls are older, but a baby? Labor, without her. Sleepless nights, without her. Trying to homeschool the girls while cooking dinner and picking the strawberries and freshening them up to sell and breastfeeding? I can't do this."

"I'm sorry." Minerva whispered to the distressed woman. "I don't know how you feel. But, Violet, she's alive, we know that. We can get her home, once we alert her regiment, it's a matter of time. You don't have to do this alone."

"I need to go home." She said then with a shrug, her entire body aching. "I can't risk being here anymore, Minerva. Not pregnant. Not when my girls are at home all alone. I need to go home."

"I agree." She nodded warmly before taking the box and opening it for the brunette. "Take the test, I'll book us a flight home and you book yourself a doctor's appointment."

"What if I miscarry?" She then asked, prompting the redhead to look up at her. "After Violet... 'died', I still kept going with injections and fertility treatment. We had the implementation about two weeks before she was called. I think it was the grief. I thought I had nothing to lose, that being pregnant would give me a reason to live. I was so hopeless when she was gone. But the stress of her being gone, the stress of work, the stress of the fucking war, how can I have not miscarried?"

"There's nothing to suggest that yet. Just go take the test and we'll worry from there." Minerva passed her the pregnancy test and the brunette nodded hesitantly, walking towards the bathroom as Minerva pulled up her phone and got to looking for flights. 

A few minutes passed, Minerva had found and booked the flight, and Clementine had left the bedroom. She held the test in her hand as she left, making eye contact with Minerva.

"So?"

She shrugged. "I'm pregnant." She said deadly. "I'm fucked."


	5. The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

Clementine got home relatively early that morning, around seven. Minerva had ended up getting on a later flight, once they got to the airport she had found a potential lead to Sophie and decided to stay a day later looking for her. By now they were both aware the lead was false, and Minerva was on a plane coming home. 

As the brunette put her backpack around her shoulders, she took a deep breath. So much had happened since she left almost five days ago. Would Hope and Evie hate her? Who knows. First things first, she needed to get inside.

She opened the car door and stepped out before closing it quietly behind her, not wanting to wake her children should they be sleeping. She sluggishly walked up the steps to the porch before sitting down on one of them and taking out her phone, just in time to see a call coming in. She sighed, swiping it open.

"Hey."

*"Hey, you're home?"*

"Mhm." She replied.

*"What did you find?"* Louis asked the girl who sighed heavily.

"We got to the base, disguised. They took us to her cell and she wasn't there." She explained with a shaky sigh, running her fingers through her hair. "She was there, recently. Her stuff was there. Minerva's contacting the regiment commander. They'll find her."

*"Oh thank god!!"*

"Yeah. Look. I'm tired. I have to go. You can come over later if you want, we have a lot to talk about." She uttered, listening to him say goodbye before she turned her phone off and dropped her head between her knees. 

The door opened and she didn't move, assuming it to be her uncle having heard her getting out of the car. When the footsteps walking towards her got closer but lighter, she turned around slowly.

"Evie. Why are you awake?"

"I saw you out here." She replied, taking a seat on the steps beside her. "How were your trip?"

"It was okay, Ev." She said, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her closely. "Have you gotten any sleep today?"

"I don't like sleeping in the room on my own." She said sadly as the brunette's expression contorted to a confused one. 

"Why? Where's Hope sleeping?"

"She's sleeping in your bed since you went away." She replied. "I think she misses you."

"Well, I'm here now. And you both can sleep in my bed tonight if you want with me. I don't wanna be alone right now either." She said with a large sigh before standing up and taking her daughters hand, pulling her up to her height, she picked the small girl up. "Come on, let's get some sleep." She opened the screen door before closing it and opening the main door, walking up the stairs with her daughter.

She opened the door to her bedroom slowly, trying not to disturb her sleeping daughter. She walked over to her bed to see Hope sleeping soundly and gently pulled back the covers to slip Evie in, tucking her in and kissing her forehead.

"Are you coming to bed?"

"I'm hungry, I'm just gonna get something to eat and make a call."

"Nooo!" She whined. "You've been working so many days please come to sleep."

"I won't be long, Ev. I'll be right back." She said, kissing her head again before she left the room, closing the door behind her with a shaky sigh. She walked towards the stairs, walking down as she took her phone out of her pocket again and slid it open to a message.

*Minerva: Violet's commander knows, he's investigation, they're going to go out tomorrow.*

She took a deep breath, turning off her phone and continuing to walk downstairs. She finally made it to the living room, where she decided to fall asleep for the rest of the morning.

Hope and Evie needed the bed more. Food could wait. She just needed to switch off for a while.

-

"Mommy!!!" She awoke a few hours later to her daughter kissing her face as her other daughter crawled on top of her, it didn't take long for her laughs to start.

"Hey girls, Evie come on now, get off my back," She attempted to sit up once her daughter had gotten off of her, pulling them both in for hugs and squishing their faces to her sides. "I missed you both," She kissed both of their foreheads as Lee walked over with a plate for her.

"Breakfast."

"Thanks." She let go of her daughters and took the plate from his hands, setting it on her lap. "Did they behave okay?"

"They were as good as gold."

"That's what I like to hear." She grinned as she took a bite of her omlete. "What do you want to do today?"

"Can we fill the pool?"

"It's the middle of September..." She uttered, looking at the two girls who stared back with puppy dog eyes. The brunette sighed, shaking her head. "Fine, we can fill the pool. But if it gets any colder, you're coming in."

"YAAAAAAY!" Both girls squeaked as the brunette shook her head, standing up and taking her plate to the trashcan with a sigh.

"Are you feeling okay?" She walked straight past her uncle and shrugged, not answering as she headed to the backyard with her daughters. 

"Mommy, come on the trampoline!" 

"I can't, I'll come on and sunbathe with you in a few minutes." She shook her head before walking towards the shed where they kept their paddling pool. She'd usually have to inflate the pool, but as she walked in this time she found it untouched and full of air, reading to be filled with water. Softening her face, she remembered last summer when Violet put the pool in as the weather started to get cold. She remembers what she had said.

*Flashback*

*"Think I'll keep it up, I'm getting to old to do this shit every year. Unless Evelyn is willing to lend her breath, that pools not going up." Violet said as she picked it up easily, grateful it was a small pool. The brunette nodded with her feet on the glass table, a book in her hands. She seemed deep in thought, not that Violet would notice, but she took the matter into her own hands when she spoke.

"Violet?"

"Huh-" The blonde pulled the pool into the shed - "What is it?"

"Come here."

"One sec!" She replied. After a few more seconds, the blonde emerged from the shed, bolting the door shut behind her as she approached her wife. She wiped her hands and leaned over to kiss her.  
"Nobody's getting in that shed! That bolt was the best thing I've ever stolen from work! Though I somehow doubt it'll stop Hope and Evie from being curi-"

"I think I want to have another baby."

Violet stopped, furrowing her eyebrows. She pulled away, not looking at the brunette and sat beside her limply. The brunette slid her hand over the blonde's knuckles and watched as she took a deep breath.

"We have Hope and Evie. I thought you wanted two kids. So we weren't, you know, outnumbered. Plus, with the war, didn't we agree no more kids until it was over."

"I did, and they are absolutely enough but... I'm reading this book and I've been reading it for a few weeks now and it's made me realize so much... What if the wars not over for another twenty years, maybe even fifty, and we're just waiting? What if it gets so bad that we don't have a chance anymore, what if this is our last chance?" She said with bright eyes. 

Violet wasn't sure even still. She sat silently as she listened to her partner rant and rave about all the good things that could come from this random idea, trying to convince herself in her own mind.

Yeah, Violet loved her kids. But the war was getting so much worse now. The only reason she hadn't been deployed yet was because she had a family and they had put her closer to the bottom of the list. Still. Another fifteen soldiers lost and she'd go. Who's to say she wouldn't be the sixteenth?

"If it were any other situation..."

"But it's not any other, this is it, this is the situation we've been handed, the one we have to work with."

"I know," Violet continued, "but if they deploy me - and it's looking like they will - that's three kids for you to handle. Not to mention a newborn. I can't leave you like that."

"You can take family leave?"

"Honey with a war going on they don't care if I have a family or not. They need men. They need women. They need able bodies. And I'm one of them."

"We could fake your asthma getting worse? That, the doctor says you can't-"

"That's too far fetched. That wouldn't work. We can't lie to the military, I could go to prison!" She pointed out as the brunette averted her gaze and her eyes filled with tears. The blonde sighed, shifting beside her to hold her face.  
"Love, if things calm down, I'd be more than happy to have another baby, you know that. The girls only just started school, do we really need to rock their world right now?"

"They're big girls, they can handle it... it's not going to happen right away, they don't even have to know until we start trying," She sniffled, still refusing to look at the blonde. "It's fine, bad idea, I get it,"

"No, no, no,"

"It's fine. I don't want to talk about it, you're right."

"I didn't say we couldn't! Just, let's wait until Christmas time, how about that? Okay?"

"Whatever, it's fine-"

Violet sighed, wrapping her arms firmly around her wife's body and squeezing lightly until she felt her hug back. "We can try for another baby if that's what you want I just want us to be aware of what could happen and be ready to face it if it does happen, okay?"

"O-Okay," she sniffled, burying her face in her wife's shirt, "I love you Vi I'm sorry."

"I love you more, you hormonal woman."*

*Present*

She grinned. Violet's plan had worked, the pool had managed to stay up all year with it not being touched. What couldn't that woman do? She wondered as she hauled it out of the shed - grateful for it's small size.

"Mommy got the pool!"

"Hope you don't have to scream," She shook her head as she walked towards the stone covered part of their lawn and dropped the pool before walking to fetch the hose.

"Mommy Hopey can do a backflip!"

"No backflips!"

"Why?"

"Because I said so!"

"Fiiiiine!"

The brunette pulled out the hose, bringing it towards the pool and draping it over the side before she turned on the tap and started to fill it. 

"Can we get into our swimming clothes?"

"You can run inside and get them, if you can get in them, great, if not just come out and I'll help you, okay?"

"Okay!! Wait I do need armbands??"

"No Evie, it's shallow, you're not gonna sink." She rolled her eyes playfully as she sat down beside the pool and waited for it to fill up, resting her head on her palm for a few minutes.

"Mommy!"

"Come here," She replied lazily from the pool as her two twin daughters ran out to her. She often wondered how most couldn't tell the two apart, but maybe it was because she was her mother. Evie had a softer nose and bangs, Hope always had her hair pinned back and looked the complete picture of Violet with it. It was also easier that Evie had squishier cheeks and a slightly higher pitched voice, but at the end of the day, who else would notice it besides her? She was their mother after all, they were her babies.

"Hopey! Where are your clothes?!"

"I can't get them on! They're in my room!"

"You're running around naked! Oh my goooood!" She groaned, standing up from the pool to run over and cover her daughter, wrapping her arms around her and walking to the outdoor cupboard, she threw a towel around her.  
"You'll freeze to death, what would your mother say?"

"I think she would duck me into the pool."

"Why don't I do it?"

"NOOOOO!" 

"Okay! Okay!" She laughed, sitting her daughter on her hip before looking at Evie, who sat patiently by the pool, her swimsuit on nearly perfectly except from the top. "I'm gonna go change your sister, do not, and I mean, do not go near the pool while I'm gone."

"I won't."

"Because what could happen?"

"Die."

"No. Well yes, but no. You'd slip. And I don't want you to get hurt, okay?"

"Yes!"

"I'll be right back." She said before running inside with Hope in her arms. "Lee, please keep an eye on Evelyn I don't trust her at all!"

"I'm doin' it." He replied as he walked out of the doors just as the brunette got upstairs and pulled open the door to her daughter's room, sighing deeply at the mess.

"What exactly do you guys do to get it so messy in here?" She asked rhetorically as she set Hope on her bed and opened her drawer to find her swimsuit. "You couldn't get them on now, could you? Might have something to do with the fact they're in here."

"Oopsies."

"Oopsies is correct." She said as she began to dress her daughter, fitting her into her purple swimsuit. "Did you miss me when I was gone?"

"A littttttle bit."

"Only a little?" She pouted. "Your sister said you were sleeping in my bed."

"Was not!"

"Well, I saw you!"

"Didn't. That was Evelyn."

"Sure." She rolled her eyes as she started to tie the small girls hair up.

"I miss mommy."

"I know, so do I." She said as she leaned forward to kiss her hair. "I miss watching TV with her at night. And I miss having her around the open the barn doors because they're really heavy."

"I miss picking strawberries with her."

"I miss doing everything with her..." She sighed as she thought of it. What if she never found Violet? She'd have to raise the girls on her own. Not to mention the baby, too... There was nowhere she'd be able to go back to work and the strawberries alone weren't likely to bring in much income. 

Even if they did lose the farm, would it even bother them if Violet came home?

"Go on, you're dressed." She said as she stood up, pushing her daughter along. "Go get Ev."

"Okay!" She said as she ran off down the stairs and Clementine listened to the sounds of her feet against the steps. Taking another deep breath, the brunette picked some of their toys off of the floor and set them on their beds before closing over their bedroom door and walking off to her own room.

"Clem?" She turned on her heel to face Lee as she walked slow up the stairs towards her.

"Who's watching the girl-"

"You need to come down stairs." He said, looking at her very seriously. The woman's heart started to pound, her anxiety setting in. "It's not the girls. I've put them in the living room, they're watching TV for a while."

She walked closer, peering over the bannister of the stairs. "What's going on?"

"Violet's superiors are here. They need to talk to you. They have a lead."


	6. Long were the nights when my days revolved around you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Who's... Who's Violet?"

"What, really??" She questioned as she took a deep breath, "I, my chest feels heavy, I need a minute,"

"You're anxious, come here," He walked over and gently took her arm, sitting her down on the nearby chair as she put her head in her hands.

"No, no, no, they're just here to mess with me. They're going to tell me she's dead. I don't, I can't take that," She heaved deeply, taking a deep breath. 

"They won't, they just want to talk. They think they have a lead. They want to search Violet's stuff. With your permission."

"I don't think I can talk to them."

"If you want me to tell them to go, I will-"

"No, I don't want them to go. But I can't talk to them. Not right now. They can search her stuff, but, but if they need to talk about the trip, I..." She stopped, trailing off.

"I can refer them to Minerva, it's okay." He promised the girl as she started to cry and leaned into his shoulder. "I know it's upsetting, but you're strong. This a good sign."

"Lee," She stuttered, "I'm in a really, really bad situation."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, I," She stuttered, wrapping her arms tight around him, "don't get mad."

"Are you in danger? Why would I get mad?"

"I'm having a baby," She said with shaky lips and a voice crack blurring her way. "I found out when I was away, Vi and I had a implementation before she left but the test was negative and now it's positive-"

"Hold on, you're pregnant?"

"Mhm."

"You went into an active warzone, pregnant??"

"I didn't know until after." She shook her head and rubbed her temples. "Please, you don't need to lecture me. I'm almost thirty years old, I know, I know I was stupid,"

"You went into a warzone pregnant, how am I not supposed to lecture you? Your kids already lost one mom, they don't need to lose you too. Have you even seen a doctor? Anything could've happened!"

The brunette pulled out of the hug and stood up, wiping her eyes. "Please just go downstairs and talk to the people I don't want my kids hearing any of this." She said, pacing around and wiping at her eyes. 

"So, you didn't, then."

"I just got home! I got home this morning, I've been home a total of maybe five hours, the last thing on my mind was a doctor, I needed to see my kids!"

"We're going to a doctor young lady and don't think we aren't." He stood and walked down the stairs, leaving the girl to cry in frustration as she walked off to her bedroom. She opened the door to her room, closing it behind her and sobbing. She felt comfortable to do this, knowing there was no way Hope and Evie would hear her. 

She took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself down before walking toward the mirror to check how noticable her state of mind was.   
Her face was red and blotchy, her eyes blood shot and as she looked at herself she couldn't help but start to cry again.

What would Violet think of the woman she saw in front of her?

Taking a few more deep breaths she turned to slump over to her bed, passing the pictures on Violet's bed side table. 

One picture of the two holding both girls on their first birthday, Evie and Hope with faint blonde hair and faces covered in chocolate cake, complete with matching party hats to Violet. She simply refused to look at the picture, dropping onto the bed and closing her teary eyes as she wished for sleep.

-

Clementine tried to hide her teary face from her daughters who sat in the back of the car, staring at their tablet as they drove to the doctor's clinic, Lee's demand. She sniffled slightly and averted her eyes to look out the window, staring at the buildings as they passed by them. They lived in a very rural area - it was easy to forget how busy life was outside of it.

"So, have you made a decision?" The man asked as he gripped the steering wheel. The brunette turned to look at him before looking in the mirror to check on her daughters, she then answered.

"I can go in myself. Somebody needs to watch the girls..." She watched his face closely for change, finding it grow somewhat frustrated. "... If that's okay with you,"

"Will you tell me the honest truth when you come out?"

"Of course I will." She shifted as the doctors building came into sight. "I never asked, what did they have on Violet? What's the lead?"

"They found a broken gate, it's not much. Violet's picture was found on Kilula beach which is about four miles away from the gate, what they're thinking is she fell in there and the water carried her across."

"That doesn't give me any answers though, does it? All that tells me is how she got to the beach, not where she went after." She muttered, rubbing her forearm. "I'm not gonna be able to raise a baby if I don't have Violet."

He pulled into a parking space and turned off the car, staring ahead for a moment before he answered.   
"We can talk about that once we know what's going on. Come on." He undid his seatbelt and opened the door. The brunette waited a few seconds, sitting anxiously as he got the girls from their seats.

"Mommy why are we at the doctors??" Evie whined as Lee put her down and she ran towards the brunette who closed over her own door, the brunette leaned down to pick her up. 

"Mommy's just here for a check up, don't worry. You don't have to come in, can sit in the waiting room on your tablet, okay?"

"I *hate* the doctors."

"So do I," She turned around to check where Hope was. "What are you doing??"

"I'm trying to put my tractor into my backpack."

"Oh Hope, can't it wait? We're already late and we really need this appointment, come on, you can do it in the waiting room."

"Fiiiiine." She sighed and took Lee's hand as they followed Clementine and Evie into the doctor's office. The brunette turned to the reception desk to speak to the woman, trying to occupy Evie in her arms at the same time.

"I'm here for the ultrasound, confirmation appointment, Everett." She cleared her throat and turned to comb her fingers through the smaller girls hair just as the reciptionist nodded and smiled at her to go on into the waiting room.

"Oh, thank god." She said as she entered the empty room as sat down, allowing Evie to sit on her lap, she sighed a kissed her cheek. "I'm so grateful it's empty."

"Yeah, you should be in and out." The older man said as he held Hope's tablet and struggled to navigate it, Clementine watched as he became visibly confused with a small grin.

"What is it?"

"She wants to play a game... princess fairy dress up?"

"No, she's not allowed to play that game."

"Why? Sounds innocent enough."

"Yeah well I heard from some of the moms at school that they heard of people contacting their kids through it... it's probably just a scary internet hoax but with Violet, we're targets... just put a show on for them on Netflix." She said, sitting back and brushing through Evie's hair again, taking note of how long it was.

"Wow, I should've tied this up. It's getting so long." She said, bundling it in her hand. "Your hairs so gorgeous, it's blonde, almost red."

"I look like a strawberry."

"Only a little bit." She said as she pulled her hair into a ponytail before letting it go and holding the small girl close, she kissed her head. "Are you gonna be good while I'm gone?"

"Will you be long?"

"I don't know, Ev, hopefully only about ten minutes." She said, kissing her head again before looking across at Hope who was almost asleep in Lee's arms staring at her tablet. The brunette grinned. The girls had barely spent any time with people who weren't Clem since Violet 'died'. She wondered, if there had never been a lead, would they spend time with others ever again.

"Clementine?" The doctor opened the door with a smile and she nodded anxiously, looking across to Lee before sitting up with Evie and sitting her on her own seat.

"I shouldn't be long." She said, kissing her forehead before turning to walk to the door. The door closed and Evie scooted over to Lee and her sister to occupy herself whilst her mom was gone.

"I was on a business trip and I took a test after a few days of suspicion, it came back positive. That was about, two, three days ago now. Violet, my, my wife and I had the transfer almost two weeks before she left for war. We took a test ten days later and it was negative, so we, I just assumed,"

"How long ago was the transfer then?"

"About, honestly uh, it's a blur... maybe six weeks? I honestly don't know. More than a month. Less than four. I'm sorry. I'm foggy I just really wasn't expecting this right now."

"Okay... date of your last period?" The doctor nodded as she looked through the brunette's file. 

"May 26th."

"You had twins five years ago. It doesn't say there was any complications with them, is that correct?"

"My oldest wasn't breathing but that's all. She had minimal breathing problems, she's got asthma, is that a problem? We weren't told it was-"

"No, that's a separate issue. Alright, hop onto the table and we'll see what's going on."

"Won't I need a blood test?"

"Only if I can't find anything."

"Oh okay, times have changed since I had the girls..." She uttered to herself as she walked over to the examination table, sitting on the side of it before she shifted to lay on it. "Can my uncle come in please? I don't want to do this alone, he's just in the waiting room with the kids..."

"Of course." She uttered, walking over to the door and opening it. Clementine waited patiently, tapping her fingers against her thighs before he walked in, she looked over her shoulder and gave him a small smile. 

"Everything's okay?"

"Just gonna check now." The brunette replied anxiously as she felt the gel against her stomach and took a deep breath. It took a few seconds before the woman could bring herself to look at the screen. "Can you see anything?"

"Sorry honey, I'm still looking."

She nodded with a deep breath and lay her head back with eyes closed, her mind racing as she tried to calm down. Her anxiety was through the roof before the nurse finally delivered some good news.

"Right, there we are." She said as the woman looked up, taking a deep breath. "It's a bit hard to see, baby's about nine inches long. Looks like you're about nine weeks and six days pregnant..."

"Is everything okay though?"

"Looks to be."

"Okay," She took another deep breath and waited for the uncomfortable examination to be over. She sat up, anxiously fiddly with her hands and not looking at either of the people.

"I'll need you back in about two weeks for a follow up."

"Wait, don't I hear the heartbeat this time?"

"You'll hear it at your next, unfortunately the audio doesn't work on this one." She explained as the woman nodded, notably pale. The doctor turned in her chair and wrote up something.  
"I'm going to prescribe you iron supplements. You may not need them yet but they're not a bad thing to have. Everything looks healthy, everything looks good, you just need to take it easy for the next few weeks, okay?"

"Mhm."

"We'll see you then."

Taking another deep breath, the girl nodded with a smile as dizziness set in. The reality set in. She was already nine weeks, Violet still wasn't back.

Oh god, what a mess.

-

After the appointment they went to pick up some groceries, with Lee and the girls going in to do it and Clementine alone with her thoughts in the car. She'd been extremely quiet the entire drive home, lost in her own mind, and everytime one of her daughters would question why they were at the doctor - she would nearly break.

When they finally got home, both Evie and Hope assisted Lee in bringing in the groceries as Clementine sat on the porch thinking about the recent events. She pulled out her phone, intending to text Minerva and give her a quick update on the baby, surprised to find a missed called from both her and Louis.

Luckily, as he usually did, Louis left a voice message.

Pressing play and keeping it low enough so that the kids couldn't hear, she held it to her ear and listened.

"Look I, I know this is crazy, but you have to get down to the fucking, fucking, oh god, okay, you need to get to the headquarters right now, they, they had a lead, they thought she was in Kilula and they got an anonymous tip, Clementine, she's found!"

Clementine's eyes welled with tears as she stood up, walking towards the car slowly, her knees weak and she listened to the rest of the voicemail before it went quiet again.

"Clem? What's-"

"She's found!" She burst out, turning around teary eyed to look at her uncle, Evelyn and Hope coming out from behind him with wide eyes. "Girls-"

"MAMA!"

"Hope?!" She called after her as her daughter ran down the yard and into the field, Evie soon following behind her. Clementine's eyes didn't deceive her, she covered her mouth at the sight in front of her.

Sure enough, halfway down the field, Louis was walking up supporting a frail blonde with a head bandages and sling around her arm. She couldn't have mistaken it, if her girls knew, then so did she. That was her wife, that was Violet, she was home.

The brunette followed her daughters, running after them at a speed that was unmatched, her heart had already left her body once she finally got to her daughters, seeing them both freeze in front of the blonde. Clementine was confused before looking at her wife.

"Violet, baby, I'm... I'm so, so, happy, you... you're back-"

"Who's," the women's voice was quiet, furrowed eyebrows as she looked at Clementine. "Who's Violet?"


End file.
